Today is a continuation of the Brain Is Cobwebs series, aka: The Random Thoughts Chronicles. I’ve been revisiting it periodically in the midst of my writing, and boy, they were really random. I wanted to write about something that’s been near and dear to my heart for quite a while now, something that I’ve often touched upon briefly in past posts.
I live alone.
Yes, it was a very daunting thought when I first stepped into the realtor’s offic. I remembered how I felt when left home alone as a kid, and assumed every day would feel a little like that. What if I got lonely? What if I couldn’t decide what to wear out at night? What if I decided to watch a scary movie all alone and subsequently scared the crap out of myself? What if everyone forgets about me while I’m holed up all alone in my pad? All alone. That’s the phrase that kept repeating itself in my head.
I’m really glad that I had so many great people to encourage me, or else I would have never done it. They had lived through the “aloneness” and even rejoiced in it. I love living all by myself now. Mind you, sometimes my house looks like a war zone; And sometimes I burn my dinner beyond recognition; and sometimes I do watch scary movies (ultimately a bad idea). I’ll also be the first to tell you that I owned only an airbed, suitcase, coffeemaker, and dresser when I initially moved in. But, no one is around to chastise me for the mess, or laugh at my failed culinary attempts, and I find that a ridiculous amount of cartoons can chase away anything that might have spooked you. Whatever the Ikea directions say, you can put that bed frame together all on your own. Years ago, a friend of mine visited me in the Bay Area and remarked upon how my apartment made her feel a little sad. She had never lived alone, and now, living with her fiancee, she would never really get the chance. It makes me feel a bit lucky, in a way, that I can come home to a place that really is all mine.
So, there are all my deep thoughts about living alone. On the other hand, I find that it’s given me rather peculiar mannerisms that other people are quick to remark on, much like the video I posted above. My quirks involve things such as:
- Spontaneous singing of questions/statements
- Adding sound effects to daily life, i.e. makeup application (Whoosh!!)
- Eating entire meals in bed. No, not like breakfast in bed. Like, it’s too-hard-to-eat-off-of-this-plate-while-sitting-in-a-chair.
- Spontaneous bad dance moves and/or flailing.
- Not using proper silverware/plates/glassware when eating meals. i.e. I stir my coffee with a butter knife every morning.
- Talking to myself out loud. I’m unfortunately infamous for this as it startled past roommates. I can’t imagine why…
There you have it, ladies and gentlemen, the pros and cons of living alone. Having your own places means you can do whatever you want, whenever you want, but don’t be surprised if the rest of society finds you irrevocably weird.