Things I Learned in 2017

Hello readers,

Despite the last two years of my life feeling a bit like a one-way ticket on the Hot Mess Express, I very much try to look on the positive side of things. Every year around my birthday my good friend Rachel asks me what she calls the “Birthday Question.” The question is simply: “What did it take you (insert your new age here) amount of years to learn?” Now, granted this time of year isn’t anywhere near my birthday, but I thought I would apply the same kind of thinking when looking back at this last year. This year was one full of milestones for me, and it took a little bit of reflection to realize that, though less than stellar things might happen in the course of your life, it is still a good life. If you need a sign from the universe that this is true, there is one in the Aria Resort in Las Vegas. I conveniently found it on my 30th birthday. And on, that note, I’m going to tell some of the things I learned in 2017:

I’ve learned how to do Las Vegas. Now, I know you’re probably thinking: “Eva, what’s there to ‘do’? You’re there at least once a year already.” Nay nay, there are certain tricks you can employ to seriously maximize your Vegas experience. Ladies, use that social media! Put as many ridiculous Vegas-related hashtags in your comments as you can think of. Save promoters phone numbers and build a rapport. Get a group of your best girlfriends and get yourself out there! Adventures await. Just make sure you take a few naps, stock up on the Red Bull, and wear your most comfortable heels. You too can “hack” Vegas if you’re determined enough.

You want the thing? Do the thing. Yes, this is a primitive way of putting it. Only you have the power to change things and do things for yourself. You want to be the go-getter? Go get things, just by taking those first steps. Sure, you might think “Dear God, what am I doing?” half the time, but you’re really creating the life that you want and deserve for yourself.

On a lighter note: I now know that I have the uncanny ability to hold two drinks in the same hand. This is especially convenient when trying to take selfies or photos of whatever event you’re at.

 

Order the thing you want. Order what you really want, and don’t regret it. Screw it. Get the lobster topped with lobster and a cocktail and dessert. This is a case in which the term “Yolo” might actually be appropriate. 

Not everyone deserves an explanation or a reaction. Sometimes, the best thing to say is nothing at all.  As someone who frequently posts her innermost thoughts on the internet, this has been a hard one for me. Sometimes people who disturb your peace just aren’t worth it. You can’t demand peace of mind from other people; you might not ever understand why they do what they do. You just have to figure it out for yourself and move forward.

Tell the people you love that you love them. Yes, it can be scary. Sometimes it doesn’t feel very good, even though it should. Do it anyway. Everyone is worthy of loving and being loved. It doesn’t have to be a quid pro quo thing. Sometimes loving someone doesn’t work out the way you want it to, sometimes it’s not enough. Tell them anyway. Don’t beat yourself up for being vulnerable. You’re a better person for it. Because, as Vladimir Nabokov so elegantly put it, we’re all just “rust and stardust” in the end. Nothing is ever guaranteed.

And lastly….

It’s not always you. 

And it’s a good life, indeed.

EVA ♥

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January: The Monday of Months

Hi all!
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 January is supposed to be the month where you magically sort out your life; create resolutions to keep yourself on track, and renew your optimism for the year ahead. I’ve given little thought to these things this year.  Quite frankly, I was just exceptionally proud of myself for wearing a statement lip out of the houses on New Year’s Eve. The bar is low, what can I say?

I usually come up with some sort of placating answer for the inevitable “What’s your new year’s resolution?!” questions we all get. Around this same time last year, I wrote about my “Holiday Hangover,” which I somewhat avoided this year (although I still have an unnatural attachment to my Christmas tree and never want to take it down). I do believe I took more chances this year, like I resolved I would. I’ve decided that his year will be different. While it sounds somewhat nutty, my resolution is to focus on me. What do want? What can I do for myself today? What kind of person do want to be?

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Like a lot of people I know, I spend a decent amount of time doing things for other people. This can be wonderful, don’t get me wrong, but when does doing things for other people suddenly turn into putting yourself second? December 2015 completely took the air out of my tires, so much so that spending a week inside my apartment with no human interaction suddenly seemed like a really good idea. I felt so depleted, I didn’t even want to do the things I had planned for my vacation. I appeased myself with a little online shopping here and there, but I knew the one thing that would make me feel better in the long run, would be to invest more time and effort into unapologetically doing the things that I want to do. Everyone tells me that your 20’s are your “selfish” years, the years you get to figure out the things you want in life. I would like to do that more this year. I want to quiet my mind enough to get lost in more books.  I want to be able to visit my family in Austria, and to go on new adventures (Africa, anyone?). I’m also really looking forward to getting the smile I’ve always wanted, and smiling a lot bigger in photographs. Maybe I’ll make it to the gym and to yoga more often, and manage to organize my home a bit better. I want to continue to make myself into the best possible version of me. I know it won’t happen overnight, but there’s also nothing stopping me.

Love,

EVA♥